“Soccer Mom” to the Band

Youngest son’s new band formed about 6 months ago.

I "heart" the Pansys

I “heart” the Panzys

I was pleased for him as he does better with the focus and teamwork that a band requires. But there were a few bumps in the beginning.

For one, when they are on the microphone and the amps are on, the neighbors get a (loud) ring-side seat to the practice.

For two, we are talking about 15-16 year old boys here, and sometimes the words that come out of their mouths do not need to be amplified. Plus, they were leaving their trash scattered about.

So we had a meeting…OK, I went down the basement steps and laid down some ground rules, including that if any neighbor called to complain about their words or sound levels, that practice at this address would cease. And that they would put their trash in the trash can, or in the sink for me to wash and be recycled.

A couple of weeks after that, I was told I was like a “soccer mom” to the band. It may have been said ironically at first. But all the boys are respectful of me and our shared space. I give them and the equipment rides to the performance venue and I pull the equipment out of the flood that occurs in my basement after a hard rain.

I have gotten to know the band members a bit, and have learned that most of them have been let down by the adults in their life and that I am a bit of an anomaly to them. One of them has started calling me “Mom.”

This is the payoff for knowing what enough is, for living the simple life, for pursuing my dreams and encouraging others to do the same. I am rich beyond measure.


15 thoughts on ““Soccer Mom” to the Band

  1. Lou says:

    Way to Go, Fawn!!!

    Thank you for being a responsible adult and a caring human being. Your kids will spend their adulthood telling amazed friends what a treasure their mom was to them and their friends. And she is.


  2. Béatrice says:

    Such a fine story! I am sure you are, as you said, rich beyond measure. Knowing that you make a difference in others lifes, is it not what gives meaning to life? And with meaning comes happiness.
    I am pretty sure that as a single working mum, you would not have the time to care about the band if you had not chosen to live a simple life and had a sharp clear sense of what do matter and what doesn’t.
    Beyond of caring for your family, you also make a difference in the lifes of people you take care of through your work.
    You have a rich life.


  3. Diane says:

    How wonderful that one of them now calls you mom. You are a great role model for those who have been “let down by adults in their life” and for your children as well. I agree with Beatrice, chosing to live simply has provided you with the time to spend on the important things like family and friends. Others are busy working very long hours and sometimes weekends to be able to buy more stuff and stuff it in their already overcrowded homes and lives.


  4. Patricia says:

    You are a blessing to these teenagers, and the neighbors must realize that by tolerating a little band music in their life that they enrich these boys too.. I know it would make me smile if I heard these kids play.


  5. Fawn says:

    I knew you guys, my fellow simple-livers would get what this feels like. Christmas and birthday and Thanksgiving all at once. You guys rock!


    • Diane says:

      I love this website. I used to also blog on missminimalist.com but the responses I get from my comments are always so negative (or, rather, anal) that I’m no longer going there. Life is too short to always have to defend your opinion. I learn more in a day from this website than months in others. Thank you so much Fawn for sharing your stories, ideas and experiences. Maybe some day we bloggers could get-together somewhere for a visit. Wouldn’t that be nice to put a face to our names!


      • Fawn says:

        Diane–I like this idea. I plan to travel after the youngest graduates in 3 years. Maybe, step one is visiting my state-side readers and step two is visiting my international readers. Anyone interested?


      • Béatrice says:

        I agree with Diane, this blog really is an inspiration and a great help on many levels. I would love a visit from you on this side of the Atlantic. I am not sure where I will be in 3 years but it is probably going to be one of these: France, Germany, Denmark, Sweden or Belgium. Life is full of surprises. Just one thing Fawn, don’t be shocked at the amount of things I have 😉 I am just minimalist in some areas (clothing, transportation, finances) not in all (books, paper and love) 😀


  6. Rose says:

    It would be wonderful to meet the writer of this blog, and the readers! I had considered on a couple of occasions to go to “The Minimalists” gatherings but couldn’t quite bring myself to go! I much prefer the natural and real aspects that you, Fawn, and others have put forward. Perhaps I’m just preferring the idea of connecting with other women living real & ordinary lives in an extraordinarily simple way!


    • Diane says:

      I agree with you Rose. I find Fawn’s ideas imaginative and realistic, whilst other sites are geared more to the extremists, e.g. selling all to live on a boat; everything you own fits in one backpack! I live in central Canada and would be willing to fly in to Fawn’s state-side. If anyone else is interested in flying to the US, perhaps we could plan something in 2015; giving us all time to organize it and save money for the trip. Fawn could let us know of a hotel near her home and of any sightseeing in her town or other towns nearby!


      • Fawn says:

        Oh, but I do want to sell everything and live on a houseboat. My blog is about what I do in the meantime. You would come to see me?!? Wow! That would be cool.


  7. Diane says:

    I thought of a boat as well if I retire in Vancouver but the mooring fees are anywhere between $600 – $1000 per month, which is more than my mortgage was on my condo.


    • Fawn says:

      Yikes! That is more than my mortgage payment too. I can probably find something cheaper here in the Midwest, though I haven’t looked yet.


  8. Jane O. says:

    Great post. I’m a teacher of 11 years and more and more, I’ve noticed when I reign a kid in respectfully and with the positive expectation they’ll meet stated goal, they love me for it. A lot of kids don’t have reliable parents, so when an adult cares without having to, it kinda freaks them out. And then they love it, hence being called “Mom.” Great work, Fawn. Gold stars all around 🙂


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